Friday, November 12, 2010

How do dissemble a toaster in 30 seconds...

It's easy.  Just drop your engagement ring in it.  You're probably thinking--"how in the__?!"  Well, last night I made turkey burgers and while mashing and making them into patties, I took my rings off and put them on the ledge above the sink.  I kept forgetting to put them back on until just a few hours ago.  I grabbed them, put on the wedding band and....clink.  I dropped the engagement ring.  Gulp.  Sh!t.  No biggie, I see it down there, I'll just pull it out on the crumb tray thingy.  Slide it out and sh!t.  It's caught up on the center stone.  Now let me say that this is the only time that I am not happy about the size of my ring.  So I flip it over and shake it vigorously trying to get the ring out.  Cling, cling, clank.  No ring.  Just a ton of crumbs.

I don't know why I start panicking.  But I do.  Sweating, anxious, that fear that I'll never get my ring back.  It's a toaster, Joy.  If it "eats" the ring, take it outside and put a hammer to it.  No biggie.  But I'm standing there shaking it in a hot sweat.  Still nothing.

Luckily, I had a screw driver (and the right kind, for once in my life) and began to dissemble the toaster.  Luckily, at the last second, I remembered to unplug the stupid thing.  I unscrewed it (those screws are ridiculously too long) and shook it some more with the bottom off of it....and out popped my ring.

And then I inspected it.  Just to make sure there weren't any teeth marks from the toaster monster.

There weren't.

It's just fine.

So last night, Richie and I took on the daunting task of taking Kinley's pictures with the O N E that I had painted earlier this week.  Oh. Em. Gee.  That was hard.  We took about 50 pictures and 47 of them are of her hind end as she was booking it out of the perfectly arranged picture area.  Richie and I were screaming at each other-- me: "hold her still" -- him:"take the picture faster"  Obviously both demands were not going to happen.  There were feathers EVERYWHERE (remember the boa?!).  It was a mess. 

But we got the three that we needed.  They aren't perfect but life with a one year old (almost!) is not perfect.  So there.  And then Richie asked me "why don't you just try and make the invites?"  And so I did.  And here is what I came up with.
I made this in MS Word.  Fun?  No.  My design program is on our desk top which was never unpacked.  So I did what I could with what I had.  And yes, I erased the address of the party.  And not because I think you're stalkers and would show up at her party....but that other guy might be.

My mom and step-dad come tonight!  I'm sooooo excited!  I need a Kinley break.  She's so busy these last few days.  So busy.  So so so busy.  In to everything.  You just don't even know.  And she can now move the baby jail.  So confinement isn't even an option.  :)   Richie and I are going to have such a blast at The Lion King.  I saw it several years ago (on a date, not with Richie, but that's not important) and still say that it was the best show ev-ah. 

But yeah, mom and Steve are coming tonight and I'm not even close to ready for house visitors.  Luckily I did get the guest linens washed (well, they are washing right now).  But I've been so absorbed into this invite that I've kind of neglected life today.  I didn't neglect Kinley.  She's fed and taken care of.  I promise. 

She did stand today!  All by herself.  Well, kind of.  I was right there.  We were on the floor together and she was hugging me and I stood her up and let go.  And she stayed.  Standing up.  By herself.  And then she just slowly sat down.  We did it like three times.  And now when I try to get her to do it again, she lifts her legs off the ground.  Little bugger.  I heart her.  (remember when people used to "heart" things instead of "loving" things?  That's old school now, no?)

1 comment:

midorilife said...

LMBO Loved this post!

 
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