1 of 75,000+

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75,000.  That is no small number.  And that is probably lower than the actual number.  That figure was accurate back in January of 2012.  We've had another graduating class since then.  So, I am among a large crowd.

Unemployed teachers in Illinois.  Yes, 75,000 unemployed teachers in Illinois.  You're looking at one of them.

I always wanted to be a teacher, always.  No other career ever seemed appropriate, or fitting.  I want to teach.  I want to be a teacher.

I will admit that I was one of the fortunate graduates to fall into a job upon completion of the program.  Getting the extended maternity leave was a complete blessing.  Not only did it give me a steady paycheck for six months, but it padded my resume with a little bit of real world experience that several of my competing candidates may not have.  But since that contract ended four weeks ago, I have felt despondent.

On my personal Facebook page, I changed my job from third grade teacher to "professional teaching application fill'er out'er" because I feel like that is all that I do.  I have applied at over 25 districts.  I am not exaggerating.  Being in the Chicago area affords me several districts to "shop" for jobs.  I shop them all.  I guess the only one that I have yet to apply to is the city of Chicago.  I just can't see myself working in the city.  And maybe that will be something that I explore in the next week or so if nothing else pans out.

Most often, I hear nothing back.  Absolutely nothing.  I spend 30 minutes to an hour on each application, if not longer, and hear nothing back.  Occasionally, maybe twice, I have received emails back from principals saying that the position was filled internally.  Legally, they have to post the position, even if they have someone in mind for the job.  That stinks, in my opinion.

I have submitted applications and emailed principals to introduce myself and still nothing.  I just don't know what else to do.

I can't help but let it ding my confidence in myself and my teaching talent.  I know that interviewing is my weakest area and lately I find myself feeling like even if do get a call, I'll bomb the interview, so why bother?!  It's a horrible feeling to have.  Knowing that my whole life, this is what I have wanted to do.  Fifty thousand dollars owed to the University and I can't doubt my ability to do well.  Do I not look good enough on paper?  Do you really need to know the right people?  I guess I don't know him/her.

I have decided that if I don't find work, I will probably be starting my Masters program.  Learning is the one thing that really excites me, so why not get a head start on another degree?  The real question is, what do I want to study?  Special Education?  Reading?

Hopefully, in the next month or two, I'll get that anticipated phone call and I'll be able to boost my interviewing confidence and blow them away with my passion and love for learning and teaching.

Otherwise, I just don't know what to do.  When you've only wanted to be a teacher, it's hard to think of something else to work towards.

I see people in different professions just soaring with success.  Why couldn't I have chosen that path?

I'm bummin.