Monday, March 7, 2011

Biceps to make the men jealous

Today has kicked my butt!  I think that I always say that, no?  But really, today has.  I sometimes worry that I'm going to get biceps the size of ummmm, Hulk Hogan.  I couldn't think of anyone else with huge biceps.  Well, that I could spell anyway. To be honest, Schwartzenager came to mind first, but I knew I couldn't spell his name without the help of google, and I'm just not that motivated right now.  So yeah, I'm worried about getting biceps the size of Hulk Hogan.  Is that even his name?  Okay, now I have to google it to see....cause I'm feeling all insecure about being wrong.  Grrr.
And, I was right.  Indeed it is, Hulk Hogan.  And apparently, I'm afraid of looking like this.  Why?  Well, because my daughter is an absolute terror in libraries.  She's a monkey.  Yes, half baby, half monkey.  She climbs on the shelves, over benches, THROUGH the shelf racks to get to the next aisle.  Ugh.

I was just trying to pick up a few books about George Washington....and good thing I was "shopping" in the children's section, because the library workers were entertained by my monkey child's antics.  They thought she was the cutest thing.  And well, she is, I know.  But that's not the point. 

Here I am struggling--STRUGGLING--with her coat (because she just had to make herself at home and take it off), my coat, her diaper bag (I only carried it to hold books.  We're totally over the whole diaper bag scene.), the books that I wanted to browse before committing to borrowing.  And all of this while trying to chase Kinley.  Sooooo fun.  Let me tell you.

I grabbed every Washington book I could in one big swoop and grabbed Kinley with the other arm, grabbed the diaper bag (with our two coats--because I had now taken mine off due to the sweating that was happening from chasing the toddler monkey) with one finger and ran over to the "baby corral" area with all of the fun board books and toys, etc for monkeys babies like mine. 

I put her down in the area, which is two deep steps down, to keep them confined......right?  yeah.  You know how well that worked.  So I worked as fast as I could, decided to just choose three and make them work. 

Carried her to the check out computer, fought with her while I was scanning, rescanning, scanning again.....the stupid thing wouldn't accept my card!  Oooooh, the nice library lady said, your card must not be activated yet since you just signed up.  My hair was all a mess, I was breaking a sweat, my pants were starting to fall down to where I looked like I was one of those kids who like for my underwear to stick out of their pants.....only thing was, my underwear was falling down WITH my pants because for some reason, they just don't fit the same as they did pre-baby.  Ugh.  TMI.  I know.  But you see my frustration.

So now that my card ISN'T activated, I grab the monkey, the books, the bag, the coats and go back upstairs to the circulation desk to see what was the problem.  Ooops, they forgot to click something to activate.  I smiled.  With my saggy bottom jeans--not apple bottom.  Kinley was riding my hip and contorting her body into any imaginable position to make it as "easy" on me as she could.  Eventually, I gave in, set her down (while the nice lady checked out my three Washington books) and Kinley immediately ran to the stairs--she was going up.

When the lady finished, I grabbed my books, grabbed my kid, grabbed our bag, grabbed our coats and out the door we went.

Hence, why I feel I may soon look like Hulk.  My arms ached when we got back to the car. 

1 comment:

Tom said...

My man...The Hulkster. Ok...his real name is Terry Bollea. I know, you're probably saying only I would know that, but as a teenager, and even later than that, seeing the Hulster live in action was totally fun...especially sitting in the first couple of rows near the wrestling ring. Oh well, I've got to tell you that this Blog you just wrote absolutely MADE MY DAY!!! You know how bad it started for me, but people around me had to wonder what was going on as I was laughing so hard.


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