So, I am new to this whole faith thing. I mean, I've heard of it, talked about it, even witnessed it in action--but I've never been fully immersed as I am today. There, I said it. I am new. I have found God and I feel it. I live it. I breathe it. And it's not like before...when I thought that I had found my faith and become one with God...I know now that I wasn't even close.
And while I could probably speak about this new found faith forever, I almost feel like I'm not quite ready to go there just yet. It's new. It's my feelings, my discovery, my life and I'm going to be a bit stingy with it for now. And don't feel bad...my husband isn't really 'in the loop' with it either. And I'm so okay with that for now.
But today has been one of those days where I feel so fully tested. I am spent. Emotionally, physically....spent. I think that I always feel like this on Thursday evenings. My school week is over and all of the cramming/studying/commuting just wears me out. And I am feeling it.
I taught a lesson today. A kindergarten lesson on money. Simple stuff. Nickels and pennies. Counting up to ten cents. I thought for sure it would be a success. Ha! Not even close. They got the nickel concept. They got the penny concept. They can count by 1s and they can count by 5s...but for the life of me, I could not get them to count nickels and pennies together. They just weren't getting it. And we're only given 30 minutes to teach and assess. It just wasn't enough time. So, I may not get a passing grade on this one. And, it'll be my first non-passing grade. Ever. I want to cry. I could go on about this class and the students and why I feel it wasn't a success but I've learned from others mistakes about blabbing online about students and teaching. I'm not going to be among them.
So I'm driving home from school and just about three blocks from KG's daycare and I miss my turn. So I just go up to the next block and take the other route. Thank God for my Garmin. I'm never lost anymore. I was talking away on my cell phone to a classmate about lessons and students and school and there they are.....cherries and berries. I got pulled over. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Ugh.
Now, I'm no stranger to speeding tickets. I have had my share in my day. More than my share. But that was back when I was dumb! I'm not dumb anymore, officer! Obviously I am. He asked me if I knew why he pulled me over. I spoke honestly, told him I had no idea and that I was on my phone. Haha My husband said that I should not have said that. Whatever. I guess I was going a little fast. 38 in a 25. Ooops. I thought I'd get out of the ticket. I didn't. $120. What do you think of that Dave Ramsey? Your little student here really screwed up this time. I get court supervision and it won't go on my record. But it still just makes me feel like a criminal. It's a terrible feeling. I tried to pay the ticket online when I got home but it's not registered yet, so I can't pay it.
I finally get to KG and at this point, I'm just so ready to get my baby and hold her and just melt into her. Well, that's not really how it goes. D tells me that she's been having crying fits and been super clingy and just off today. I'm guessing teething. It's always something! Always. So she goes to get her up (she's always napping when I pick her up) and I'm waiting with open arms for her at the door and what does she do? Runs for D's dog. Hey, nice to see you too! Remember me?! I GAVE BIRTH to you?! I rank right below the dog. Nice.
This day just gets better and better.
So we get home. She cried most of the way. It was lovely.
I tell the husband to grab sour cream at the store on his way home so that I can make the chicken noodle casserole for dinner.
He gets home an hour later. With cream cheese.
Ahhhhh, check please!