If guilt were visually measurable, I would guess that it would be the 50,000 ton elephant living in my gut. Student teaching has changed our lives so much already and we're only three days into it. And my husband has started a countdown--on 73 instructional days left to go! Is that all?
I made the decision to not discuss my class or students based on the fact that so many teachers have been slammed in the news for blogging/facebooking about their class and students. I won't be among them.
But what I will say is that this is some tough business.
I wake up a little after 5 to shower and begin getting ready. Kinley has been joining me. So R and I juggle getting ready and playing with her. She is dropped off at day care by 6:30 and if we're lucky, we pick her up by 5:00. Drop-off is becoming increasingly harder and she has been crying. I am so thankful that R does the drop-off because if it were me, I probably would have quit school by now.
She misses us. She misses being home. We get her home, cook dinner, play in her room for 30 minutes, she bathes and then it's bed time.
I miss her. I miss being home with her.
Didn't take long, did it?
I guess it's so hard because I realize that our days together at home are gone. I will (hopefully) be working after I student teach and really, all we will have is summer!
She is going to grow up so fast now...it always seems that they grow faster when you're not with them every minute of every day.
It's tough, this workin' mom thing. I have an all new respect for those that do from when their babies are tiny things....I was fortunate enough to (mostly) be a stay at home mom for almost two years.
I won't be doom and gloom forever, after all, I am doing this for us. For her.
And she does love her new day care.
It's just an adjustment phase for all of us.
|A sneak peek....|