I have been blessed

Have I told you before how blessed my life truly is?  Have I mentioned how great my marriage is these days?  Have I talked about the most amazing little girl ever created by God? 

I feel so blessed. 

My student teaching is going along flawlessly and while still extremely challenging, I am learning so much and my efforts are not going unnoticed.  Which means the most, really.  I have been complimented by some of the toughest critics and I am humbled by their comments.  My fingers are crossed that this permanent sub position for my cooperating teacher opens up to me in January.

Because it is such a long maternity leave for her, it has to be opened to all interested applicants.  Then they will be doing peer interviews and finally selecting a sub for her classroom from January 3 through the end of the year.  Having been with the students since the first day of the school year, I obviously feel that I am the best candidate!  :)  But time will tell....  and I hope and pray that they pick me!

Today I got to work and opened my net book to get my Smart Board set up for the morning message and lunch counts and surprise!  Only ten minutes remain on the battery.  Really!?  It charged all night!

I was in a panic. 

It was raining (thank God!), so I knew that R would be rained out at work.  So I texted him and begged him to please bring me my charger.  Almost my whole day was on the Smart Board and I would be lost without my net book.  I was freaking out.

He was still working (on office stuff?) but left anyway to go home, get my charger and drive it all the way to my school.  Knight in shining armour.  For sure.

Heather, Bethany, Me and Gina

I am blessed to have some of the best friends a girl could ever dream of.  These girls have been my rock when so many things seemed wrong.  They love my daughter like a niece.  They love me like a sister.  We are so close, even though we live so far apart.  I got to sneak away for a quick trip last weekend and was able to visit with them over appetizers and drinks.  I needed that.  They refilled my soul when it was running low.  I love them.  So, so very much.

And that little girl?  The one that blows me away with her beauty.  The one that amazes me with her intelligence.  The one that has me singing Twinkle Twinkle into the phone on my way home from work every day.  The one that makes me dance and twirl like I am a child again.  The one that melts my heart over and over and over again. 

You know the one...

She's my angel.  Everything that is right in our world.  And if there is one lesson that I can teach her in this life, it is to put herself first when it comes to her education.  I hope that she gets her education when she's young so that she never has to miss these precious times with her babies, just as I feel I am now.

I work a lot of hours with student teaching, and thank God I have a great husband that has done nothing but pick up the slack and not once complain.  He drops her off at day care, picks her up, cooks dinner, grocery shops, cleans, baths her....anything and everything I need.  I couldn't be doing this without him.

See....
Blessed.
Truly, blessed.

Thursday is KG's first day at the new "scoo" and I am thrilled beyond belief.  I can't wait to see how much she learns and how many friends she makes.  She makes me so proud.

Celebrate, celebrate, dance to the music!

Oh lordy, lordy!  I never thought Friday would come this week!  It was a week.  Ugh.

I guess that I don't even know where to begin.  It's hard playing weekend catch-up on the blog.  And I am not even sure why I started blogging at this particular moment....R is out getting us dinner at a local place and I'm sitting here with Kage while she munches on chicken nuggets and fries.  I know, I know.  Sooo healthy.  Don't worry.  She has corn on her plate too.  And ketchup.  And she's dipping the corn in the ketchup.  She's adventurous, what can I say?

Can I brag on myself a little bit?  Of course I can!  I blog.  I can say whatever I want here!  So let me just say that I totally rocked out the teaching this this week.  And after the week I had, I needed that confirmation from my supervisor today.  Monday and Tuesday of this week, I was ready to drop out and just say forget it.  Today?  I am a teaching rock star.  And my supervisor....agrees.  She told me that I am the top student teacher in her group.  She was singing my praises and I was given "Proficient" on the majority of the rubric for my 5 week assessment.  She claims that only student teachers at the end of the semester earn "Proficient."  I take that as a huge pat on the back. 

I am feeling so proud of myself. 

Makes me wish that I could celebrate tonight.  But, I can't.  Toddler, remember?

We walked to Kinley's new day care yesterday to drop off the paperwork.  And yes, I said that we walked there.  It's that close.  Like two minutes from our door to theirs.  No joke.

She did not want to leave!  That makes me feel so much better about my decision.  Her current sitter is trying everything in her power to keep her....but yet the one thing that I want her to do, she doesn't.  She gives me no info about her day.  At all.  And I hate that.
We had to miss our cupcake Friday this week due to my (uber successful) evaluation going over so long...but Kinley was just as happy with the baggie of grapes that I saved her from my lunch.  I always save something for her from my lunch.  It makes her day.

And to celebrate my other big feat this week....I met my own personal goal.  I used the Smart Board for my lessons this week.  And can finally say that I'm confident and comfortable using it.  Supposedly, it will set me apart from other applicants when it comes to interviewing.  So let's hope that rings true!

This momma needs a j-o-b!

I guess that about wraps up my update (and my free time )....so I look forward to catching up with everyone this weekend!

So What Wednesday

Link up with Shannon at Life After I "Dew" and join me in saying So What... 

• I have succumbed to laziness and decided to have my work pants dry cleaned each week.  Ironing takes too much time--which I already don't have enough of.
• I was totally bummed when I found out that our neighbors were moving to New Mexico.  They were our "in a pinch" sitters for Kage.  Boo.
• We're so wishing we could ditch our marriage counseling appointment tomorrow and watch Survivor instead.
• I have enjoyed a lovely Bud Light Lime every night for the past several days.
• I'm totally jealous of the blogs that have a zillion followers.  How do you do it?
• I have doubted my decision to be a teacher a few times this week already.  It's a tough week.
• I am consumed with ideas for Kinley's birthday gifts, but zero desire to plan a party.
• Now that Kinley is weaned off of the pacifier (or it seems that way), I am terrified that our next order on the agenda is potty training.  Ugh.
• I rocked out to Debbie Gibson today.  Don't worry, I was alone.
•  I did a rap with my students today about the heart.  This girl...can't rap.
• My new shoes gave me a blister on my "ring toe."  And yes.  I call it my ring toe.  Dumb.  I know.
• Even though neither of us admit it, I guess we tried getting pregnant this month.  And I'm reminded of how much I loathe the two week wait.  Almost over.
• I love the way that Kinley screams "Mom" and it's even cuter when we're in the grocery store and I'm out of her sight.  She look for me and calls out "mom!  mom!"  in that sweet voice!

 

 

 

She's all I talk about...

Okay, I get it.  I know that she is all that I talk/blog about.  But, if I'm not teaching or lesson planning, I'm with my girl. 
And there is no other place that I'd rather be.  And that's no lie.

We have been working on her fall wardrobe the last week or so.  I have stocked up on every color of yoga pants for her.  And they are fold down waistbands....oh! So cute!  We cleared out The Children's Place....she got jeans and several long sleeved tees.  I bought her lots of comfy, day care friendly stuff.  Tonight, we got her another couple pairs of shoes.  Mom cleared out Carter's big sale a few weeks ago when they had everything 50% off....I think she's set.  Or close to it. 

When we got home with our haul, we packed up a garbage bag full of summer clothes that we may or may not see again next year.  If she continues to grow as slowly as she has, we'll most likely get another season out of them.

It blows me away that my baby girl is almost into size 18 months.  I look at the newborn sizes and remember buying them just the other day...or so it seems. 

Sporting her fall jacket...and she found the pockets!

And not all fall shopping is about the clothes.  She had to get a new baby too.  I've been wanting to get her one of the Corolle Mon Premier dolls for some time and found that the Pampers Rewards had one in the rewards catalog!  Cha-ching!  Cashed those puppies in and a few days later, Kinley had her new vanilla scented baby.  And she loves her.  But she still remains nameless. 

Tell me what your thoughts would be....

This morning I received this picture from Kage's babysitter.  Along with it came this message:

She must have been tired from the weekend.  This is how tired she is every morning.

To which I replied:

Oh my gosh!  Poor baby girl.  She was up late last night with grandma and grandpa swimming at their hotel.

And then she said:

She fell fast asleep today but she does this almost everyday.  She loves to climb on the couch to snuggle with my fluffy blanket and watch TV.

Let me dissect:
My child refuses to chill on the couch.  Like, ever. 
Why is she not being stimulated with puzzles or books or another child to play with or coloring or human contact?
Where is the fluffy blanket that she loves to snuggle?
Why does it look like she was sat there and left to pass out?
Why is she in front of the TV when you "advertised" educational setting?
If she does this everyday, don't you think that maybe you should be changing the routine or something to stimulate her?

I could go on and on.  But this picture, the one that was burned into my brain all day long, the one that breaks my heart to see....

Is reason enough to be pulling her out and putting her where she deserves to be.

A day care update...

We made the big move.  Well, we're ready to make the big move.  I gave our current babysitter her notice and paid our deposit at the new school.
Now I just have to do the mountain of paperwork for the new place and her first day will be September 29.  I asked my husband to take the day off on the 29th to allow her a half day of transition.  Then on Friday, I will leave right after the bell rings to get her as early as possible. 

Monday, October 3 will be her first real full day.

Her current sitter really made me feel guilty about pulling her out.  She had tears in her eyes and sent me a big, long text about how upset her kids were..etc, etc.  I felt so bad!  It made me really question my decision.

And then on Friday (the day I gave her notice), I got no info on Kinley the whole day.  So, no clue when she napped, no clue when/what she ate, no clue on her diaper changes.

That sealed the deal.

I'm tired of being in the dark when it comes to my own daughter. 

If the lack of communication continues, I will pull her sooner.  But I wanted to at least give her a week notice.  That's the nice thing to do, right?

I'm really getting excited about the new place.  I think that Kage is going to really blossom having this curriculum and structure every day.  AND, I found out that picture day is during her first week.  So she'll be in the class picture and get fall pictures taken.  It's the little things. 

Life is all about the little things.

I sometimes worry that she'll never have pictures of
her and I experiencing life.  I'm always behind the
camera.
I promise, I do things with her too.  No one takes pictures
of it though.

Sandboxes aren't her thing.  She finally decided to walk in the one at
the zoo but she won't touch the sand or take her shoes off.  She hates
getting dirty.  And this day, I obviously didn't plan for a stop at the
sandbox--note the white tights and dress shoes.  Oh well.

Daddy, Kinley and Grandpa

She grew up...

How did it happen?  Or better question may be, when did it happen? 

On Friday, I was driving home from work and spending my hour commute zoned out in lala land...letting my car go on auto pilot.  I was lost in my memories from December 11, 2009.  The day when I became a mom.  The day that I learned what real worry and real love really meant.  It was the day that will forever be ingrained in my mind as the day I grew up.  The best day of my life...even though the most scary day of my life.

I remember my doctor saying that she'll break my water at noon, and at 11:45 my husband ran down to the hospital cafeteria to grab some food, knowing it would be the last time he would be able to eat for a long while.  He barely made it back up before my water was broken.

I then spent an hour in the whirlpool tub, feeling real contractions and thinking I was going to die.

Another hour went by and I finally got my epidural.

My mom finally made it to the hospital and we all hung out just waiting for the time to push.

Took me only 43 minutes to push her out.

And then she was rushed away to the NICU after laying eyes on her for a few short seconds.  I remember those seconds as a whirlwind of panic, fear, excitement, sadness....I think that was really the only moment in my life where I could honestly say I felt every human emotion rolled into one.

It wasn't until several hours later that I would lay eyes on my sweet baby girl.  The one who had been kicking me and rolling inside me all of those months before.  That sweet girl that I had yearned for, for so long. 
My daughter.

The days following her birth, I honestly have a hard time remembering.  We roomed in at the hospital for the duration of her NICU stay.  I spent my days at her side and pumping my boobs for her nourishment.  It was the closest I could get to her...and the least that I could do.

This time seems like it was just yesterday.

But it was really almost two years ago.  Two years.  Has it really been that long?  Is she really that big?  How did it go so fast?  I feel like I blinked and my baby grew up.  Did I miss it?  Did I enjoy it as much as I should  have?  Did I cherish every moment?

We have been working so hard on the pacifier weaning...  it's sort of been our mission.  We got it down to bed time only in the last couple of weeks.  We were proud of that.

And then this weekend, I realized something. 

She is "big" now.  She gets things that I don't give her credit for.  She comprehends.  She understands.

I can talk to her.  I can explain to her.  I can tell her what is happening.

And so I did.

At bedtime tonight, we did our story time and read four or five books and then she gave grandma and grandpa kisses and love (they are in town this weekend).  She ran in to the kitchen to her paci bowl and I picked her up and showed her that it was empty, aside from a lonely M&M (which we put there earlier).  I told her that the paci had to go bye-bye to another baby.  I explained that she is a big girl now and doesn't need it anymore.  I explained that only baby's need the paci and paci went to live with another baby.  And then I told her that paci left her a treat instead. 

She pondered for a second.

Snatched up the mini M&M (I don't give her the regular sized ones just yet) and put it in her mouth.  I sat her down and she ran to her room.

We said prayers.  She gave us kisses.  She went to sleep.

She grew up.